March Music Roundup

 I haven't shared any songs in awhile so I thought I'd share some that have been a blessing to me recently.  These are mostly newer to me artists.  

A friend introduced this song by Katy Nichole to me,  

Sarah Reeves is a singer my husband heard on a podcast he follows and shared her music with me.  

Lydia Laird is one of my favorite to listen to; I love her voice and the lyrics to her songs are wonderful.  

Jeremy Rosado is a singer we heard at a festival in the fall and I was so blessed by his testimony, love for others and lyrics.    

We are Messengers isn't new but this song has really blessed me.

 

In Jesus Name by Katy Nichole

 

Details by Sarah Reeves

 

This I know by Lydia Laird

 

Come & See by Jeremy Rosado

 

 Close by We Are Messengers

 

 

Bonus: This song was released by Dolly Parton after the passing of her husband (Carl Dean) of almost 60 years!  What a beautiful tribute and testament to a long-lasting marriage. 

If You Hadn't Been There by Dolly Parton 

 

Word for 2025

 

 

Back in June of 2023 I blogged about the book I was reading Having a Mary Heart in A Martha World and in that post, titled Busy, Busy, Busy I shared an expanded version of the verse above.

 "Come to me, all who [labor until worn out] and are [loaded down, burdened] and I will give you [refreshment for your soul].  Take my [bar that unites us in work] upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and [lowly in spirit relying on God] and you will find [blessed tranquility of soul].  For my yoke is [good, eternally useful] and my burden is [easy to bear, not burdensome]." 

I found this expanded version to be such an encouragement.  The different definitions for the burdens we will face and the different types of rest Jesus provides shows how His care is so complete for every circumstance we will face.  The ideas of refreshment and tranquility especially spoke to me; similar yet different and nourishing our souls in different ways.  We can be refreshed to carry on and we can carry on in tranquility when we are united with Jesus in His purposes and relying on Him for every step.

A few months ago I was chatting with one of our girls and she suggested the word rest for 2025.  The more I thought about it the more I realized how well it dovetails with my word for 2024.  I had chosen faithful as my word for 2024.  As God has been teaching me to be faithful, regardless of if things change or don't change; learning to rest in His faithfulness and to leave those things that burden me in His hands, is an important thing to focus on in 2025.  

The other side to this is the day-to-day practice of learning that it's okay to rest.  In a world where we're constantly told to be more, do more, learn more, find our value in more.  We need to  remember that we have value in Whose we are not what we do, that being united (yoked) with Jesus means we just have to follow His lead and it's okay to let the rest go.  To not be distracted by things/busyness that doesn't really matter.  To find our rest in Him is what we really need to do. 

So, my word for 2025 is rest! 

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year to you all!  As with the start of any new year I'm pondering what I want to focus on this year.   I already have a reading plan for reading through the Bible in 2025 and I already have a "word" for  the year.  I'm hoping to blog about both of these soon. 

One goal that I always seem to have is to blog more often.  I go through spurts of blogging regularly and then get busy and it falls to the side for awhile.  I've realized that, while I love blogging, it's just something that for now will stay a bit sporadic.  Life is still very busy with home,  four kiddos and their activities, along with school and church volunteering responsibilities.  I've never had a large readership; which for the most part I'm okay with. I would love to grow this blog into something to really bless others; I'm just never quite sure what that would look like.  I mostly blog to keep track of things God is teaching me; I love to teach so it's encouraging when God uses those things in the lives of others as well. 

I've debated starting another blog.  As some may recall, a few years ago this blog was flagged as "inappropriate" on Facebook by someone I had as a connection (still don't know who and it really doesn't matter).  There is no appeals process so since that time it has been blocked from being shared on any Meta platform (Instagram, Facebook, etc.).  I don't have a clear direction of turning this into something bigger so I'll just keep it as is for now.  

I'd love to hear suggestions of what you enjoy reading for content or what you would enjoy seeing more of here in this little spot on the web.  

So, those are my rambling thoughts on this first day of a new year.  I am excited to see how God will guide this year.

Advent Season: December 1st

Back in 2021 I took the suggestion to read a chapter in Luke each day beginning December 1st. I would read a chapter and then note what I learned about Who Jesus is from each chapter.  There are 24 chapters in Luke so you end on Christmas Eve (I ended a bit after this).  

You can read my thoughts from Luke chapter 1 here.  As I was looking over my thoughts from that first chapter I noticed the truth that Jesus keeps His promises.  He is faithful and trustworthy.  

This year the theme for the advent series at church is A Season of Promise and today the message was about the "Promised Forerunner" John the Baptist.  We were encouraged to keep praying and trusting that God's promises will be fulfilled.  

I recently saw a quote that said "when we get to Heaven it will feel like a big sigh of relief" and I felt that to my core.  The striving and struggles and sin will be over.  The promise of Heaven is real and available to all who come to Jesus, repent, and submit to Him as Lord of their life.  This Advent season I pray that you will come to Jesus, rest in His promises and find joy and rest. 

We sang this song at church this morning and the message of promised rest was such a gift:

** You can find the complete series I blogged about the book of Luke in 2021 by going to the posts from December 2021 in the side bar**

Encouragement for Public Schooling Mamas

The subject of public schooling has been on my mind for awhile. I often get so disheartened when I see Christians blasting other Christians as bad parents who don't really care about their children's faith, simply because their kids go to a public school.  I also see a lot of fear mongering and just plain false information posted.  For example, before we sent our kids to public school I was told that they would never hear the national anthem, say the pledge or learn anything about religion.  These are all false!  Not only do they say the pledge and hear the anthem daily, they also have entire units dedicated to learning about world religions.   Does public schooling bring certain challenges, yes!  But I want to give encouragement that God does lead some Christian families to public school their children, and in that choice there are also many, many blessings.

Our kids did not always attend public school.  For several years they all attended a local private school.  However, over a couple of years God made it very clear that it was His plan for our kids to move to the local public schools.  I want to share a few things I've learned and some encouragement for others who God has lead to this path. 

10 lessons I've learned from being a public schooling mama:

1) God is doing amazing things! - Students are hungry for faith. They are asking questions of other students.  Believing students are sharing their faith; and through this God is bringing kids to faith in Him. My kids are so excited to see other believers at school!  My daughter recently had a birthday party, she invited 8 friends from both church and school...all the girls knew each other as some attend our church and her school and some only the school.  These connections are so important and encouraging.  There are SO many things God has done over these years.  Many are not my story to tell here but if you see me in person I'd love to share some of them.

2) We are called to be salt and light.  If there are dark places we are called to shine God's love and truth into those dark places.  We cannot shine into those places if we are all huddled in one corner.

3) Get involved!  - A couple years ago I took one of our daughters to a school event; as I stood there watching her run around with her friends I realized that I didn't know anyone.  It was a very humbling moment. I decided to get involved with the PTO; it has been such a blessing (and a huge step out of my comfort zone) to meet the kids, teachers, admins and other parents.  I love volunteering, interacting with the kids and getting to know those that work in the school.  

4) Don't compare! - This is a hard one for me because as mamas we are always wondering if we're doing enough, making the right choices.  Over the years I have had doubts if we made the right choice, I'm thankful for my husband who reminds me how clearly God made it that this was His desire for our kids; and to not look back with "rose-tinted" glasses.  When I start to compare (in many areas) my husband always says "This is what works best for our family; who cares what other people think." 

5) God is always in control!  - We are not called to live in fear!  Do we want to protect our kids? Absolutely!  But if our motivation is to only protect our kids we have failed them.  We are called to be in the world but not of the world.  The truth is we can't protect them from everything; and often God uses the hard things to help them grow in their faith...so it can actually be a disservice to try and keep them from ever facing hard things. 

6) Prayer is key! - I remember when I first had my kids; I prayed that they would feel comfortable talking to me about anything.  There have been times that I would jokingly say to my husband "what did I ask for?" of course I didn't mean it; but it's hard to hear your kid's struggles when you can't just "fix" it for them.  God has shown me over and over again how prayer is key.  I recently saw a saying "I can't...but I know a Guy".  I love this!  There's SO much I can't do or know, but I can always take it to the One who does know, who can do abundantly more than I could ever ask or think. 

7) Communication is key!  - This is both with your kids and with the school.  We have always encouraged our kids to talk with us about anything, to question things but always be respectful when doing so, and to advocate for themselves. If they have a school issue, we encourage them to go to their teacher or guidance counselor.  If we need to step in, we will.  There have only been a couple of times when I've had to communicate with administration and both times they were very quick to resolve the situation and we still have a very positive rapport with them.  Also, learn to embrace discussing things that, at first, might be uncomfortable.  God's Word does not shy away from teaching about hard things and neither should we.

8) Salvation is by grace not their works or yours!  - No schooling choice is a guarantee of strong Christian children neither does a schooling choice doom them to a faithless life.  As parents we pray, we disciple, we try and do our best to raise our kids in the Truth; but they are humans and have free-will.  I have seen kids from every schooling choice walk away from God and I have seen kids from every schooling choice dig deep in their faith and do amazing things for God.  This does NOT mean we don't do our best to raise them in God's Truth but we must not give into a prideful attitude thinking it's all up to us; or our way of schooling is the only "right" way.

9) God does not stop at the school doors!  - This is something I remind my kids all the time.  God is always with them.  Prayer is always available.  The Holy Spirit in them is always with them!  I have a friend who says "when our kids become believers they don't get a "junior" Holy Spirit; they receive the full power of the Holy Spirit".  Now, yes, there is a difference in their human maturity but the Holy Spirit is not limited by that. 

10) Knowledge can lead to greater confidence in God and greater compassion for others.  - It is important for our kids to know what the world believes.  Truth is stronger than lies because God is greater than the devil.  One of our kids came home and was frustrated about a lesson on evolution and how it was being taught as fact.  One of our high school kids came home frustrated about a lesson on abortion and how it didn't cover a lot of facts about the risks of abortion.  In both cases we sat down and discussed how that just because someone says something, you don't have to agree or believe it.  BUT, it's so important to know the thinking behind these issues because you can have more productive discussions about issues.  To know what the arguments are and to dig into why we believe differently, why God instructs us to live certain ways can strengthen our own faith and help us to not be so reactionary and combative.  It can lead us to reach out in compassion, with greater understanding.  We tend to fear the unknown, things that are different or that we don't fully understand, knowledge helps battle these tendencies.  Instead of seeing people as "others" we can, instead, see them as those that God loves and wants to come to repentance and belief. 

BONUS: Don't be afraid to change direction if God so directs.  We have always tried to have an attitude of "this is where God has us now".  No one knows the future, we certainly never planned to public school our kids when we were first having kids; but this is where God has lead.  God may change that path again, we take it one year at a time.  

One final thought. The other day I was having a discussion with one of our kids about why people voted certain ways.  As I was explaining different issues and the views on both sides of those issues, suddenly, my kiddo said "oh, so people really are just looking for someone to give them hope."  Yes, exactly!  Our world is so hungry for hope.  Let's be sure to be out there living in the world but showing them that we are not of the world.  Not living our lives in fear of those different than us or being afraid that God's Truth isn't strong enough to battle the devil's lies.  We have a hope and peace that they too can have.

If you are following God's path for your family...then you are doing awesome Mama!  Keep praying, keep trusting and when you see those posts disparaging us for public schooling our kids...pray for the one who posted it, and then go hug your kiddos and give a high five to their friends!

Five for Friday

This summer is flying by!  Every time I think about sitting down to blog it seems that something else takes priority.  Not in a bad way...it has just been busy.  After seeing Mrs. T over at Across My Table, do a few Five for Friday posts, over the years; I thought it would be fun to do one here.  

 

 

1) DEVOTIONAL: 

What do we do with those hard things that seem to always keep coming up?  Two things recently have helped me think about this differently. One is a line from JJ Heller's song God Is Still Here.  

"What if the thorn deep in my 

side is only there to help me see

That though I never ask for it 

the desert is God's gift to me?"

 

This summer I've been having Maisie read to me to keep up with, and improve, her reading skills.  She will sometimes say "mom, can't you just read it to me", "I hate reading" or will continually stumble over a word she's read before.  In talking to a teacher friend, she mentioned that some kids see a word once or twice and get it while others need to see it up to 20 times before they remember it.  

 

I continually encourage her that while it is hard and may take a lot of practice, the reward of being able to read well will be worth it.  The world will open up in amazing and exciting ways.  All her future learning will be so much easier. 

 

I thought, how like us is that.  God could just do it for us,  but often we will face the same challenge over and over because he knows that we need to learn.  That once we can learn the lessons of the struggle, the reward will be so much better.  Those lessons will equip us for the future purposes He has for us. 

2) COOKING: 

 

We have been enjoying a lot of salads this summer.  One of our favorites is this Israeli Pearl Couscous Salad from No Spoon Necessary , Someday I'm hoping to do a salad round-up post with many of the recipes we have enjoyed. 

 

 

(Image from NoSpoonNecessary site)

 

3) FAMILY:

 

This summer has been filled with highs and lows.  The beginning of the summer included some deaths in the family, hospitalization of another family member, and some other really hard challenges revealed for another family member.  Through it all we have also seen God's hand and grace over and over.  These hard things have given us opportunities to reconnect with some family members and rekindle really precious connections.  This summer has also allowed for many great memories to be made.  Having all the kids home has been fun and we've enjoyed hikes, trips to the beach, friends visiting and of course road trips for delicious seafood.  More fun plans are still to come as we squeeze every bit of fun family time in while our college kiddos are home. 

 

4) READING: 

I'm happy to say that I hit my Goodreads reading challenge for this year.  Last year I had a hard time reading 15 books so I left that as my goal for this year.  Currently I'm studying through the book On Bended Knee by Crickett Keeth, a study of prayers in the Bible.    For "fun" reading I'm reading The Book of Charlie by David Von Drehle, the story of his neighbor who lived to be 109 years old.  Both are wonderful reads. 

 

5) CHALLENGE: 

 

I recently saw a challenge on Instagram (can't remember who posted it); where women were challenged to pray for other women.  The challenge was to choose 12 women and match them up with a month, then spend a month praying for that "month's" woman.  The challenge mentioned not to let them know.  I love this idea.  While I obviously pray for men in my life also, I think the unique challenges that we have as women can help us to pray in a very special/understanding way for other women.  So, I sat down the other day and as God brought someone to mind I jotted down their name next to a month.  There are two months still without names.  I have many women in my life but want to seek God's leading for this challenge and at this time He has only impressed 10 women on my heart.  I fully trust that He will bring to mind those two women as those months get closer.  So, will you join me in this?  As a further challenge, maybe choose some women who are "sandpaper people" to you.   

I hope you enjoyed this quick post and the pictures from some of our summer adventures.

  

Thankful Thursday: Countdown to Thanksgiving

Seems hard to believe that next Thursday is Thanksgiving.  I'm grateful for this month; where many take a more focused look at gratitude.  It's easy to focus on what is wrong with this fallen world but oh! the gift of focusing on the goodness of God!  How that even in such a fallen world His faithfulness, goodness, and grace are on full display.  

 

 

 

 There is SO much for us to be grateful for.  So here is my list of things I'm thankful for this week:

    - I'm thankful for walks & talks with good friends who encourage, pray for and walk life with me.

    - I'm thankful for the energy & time to get tasks done ahead of "schedule".

    - I'm thankful for Scripture; God's Word to us!  That it is always relevant, fresh and living.

    - I'm thankful for God's patience and understanding with me.  His timing of giving just what I need when I need it.

    - I'm thankful for talks with my kids, including those unexpected calls from our oldest two as they navigate college and see God working.

    - I'm thankful for "car concerts" with my girls! And for new songs shared with me by my kiddos.

The song below was shared with me last night by one of my daughters.  I love the message & the sound of this song.  The reminder to "put it down" and trust Jesus.  Take a minute to listen; I pray you will be blessed and encouraged.

What are you especially thankful for this week?

Thankful Thursday: Countdown to Thanksgiving

 It is getting bu-sy around here!  So, I'm especially thankful for a quiet minute to sit and blog.  Earlier this week I wrote up a schedule for the next two months and posted it on the fridge.  It's broken down by week and the things I need to do each week.  Getting things down on paper helps me to put into perspective just how much I need to do (which often feels much less overwhelming once I'm not trying to mentally keep everything straight) and also to feel the accomplishment of checking things off the list.  So, in honor of that thinking here is a list of things I'm thankful for this week.

Image from Country Living Magazine

1) For God's patience and faithfulness!  That as I learn and grown He's always there and shows me clear reminders that He's listening and He really does understand and will provide just what I need..when I need it!  His grace and timing are perfect!

2) For godly friends to "do life" with.  Such an encouragement and so much fun to have them in our lives.

3) For cozy homes on cold days.

4) For the simple things like fun new recipes and cozy books.

5) For new songs that encourage.  I love this song as it combines Scripture truth, an old hymn and new sound.

Thankful Thursday: Countdown to Thanksgiving

Yesterday I was thinking how I wanted to do some sort of blog series to focus on gratitude this month.  At first I thought I'd like to post each day but realistically that just isn't going to happen.  So I'm planning to post each Thursday.  So today I'm sharing a verse that I found encouraging and a new-to-me song that was a great reminder and encouragement to me this week.  I'm so very thankful for how God brings specific truths into every situation we face and at just the right time.  Extend grace, increase thankfulness, glorify God!  It is ALL for His sake!  Focus on God!

The graphic at the bottom is something funny I saw on Instagram. Wouldn't it be great to always skip over the panic part...definitely a work in progress in my life. 

 What are you thankful for today?

October already?!

It's hard to believe that October is already here!  I've been meaning to jump back in on the Happy Homemaker Monday posts but just haven't seemed to have the time.  Hopefully, in the next couple weeks I'll be able to do a few before the holidays start up!

The last few weeks have been filled full!  We celebrated another family birthday, had the annual Beach BBQ & Baptism with our church, spent time with family who were visiting from out of state and started all the fall activities up again.  

One of the fall activities we are involved in is the AWANA program at church.  I help out with the 3rd graders and this year our youngest started Sparks (K-2).  She was SO excited to earn her vest and book by saying John 3:16. 

 If you're not familiar with AWANA it's a great kids program that teaches Biblical truths while focusing a lot on Scripture memorization.  The older kids have youth group, PTO for the school has begun and clubs at the high school are also getting back into full swing. So, all that to say, we are good and life is FULL right now. 

One fun thing is that the deer we spotted in our yard have returned a few times now. I was able to get another picture of them yesterday.  There is a shrub along the edge of our yard that they really love to eat; thankfully they do not care for the blueberry bush leaves or lilacs so I'm happy to let them roam and eat the wild shrubbery. 

Oh!  and I also finally started working on my daughters graphgan.  This one is definitely going to be a process but I'm already liking the results from the small amount I've been able to get done.  

One last thing, our oldest girl is away at college (and loving it!); while there she is attending a church in town that only has acappella music in their services.  The song below is one of her favorites and a new-to-me song so I thought I would share.  I love all types of music but don't listen to a lot of acappella music.  I really enjoyed the beautiful harmony of voices.  Enjoy!

lt really IS a Good Friday

"but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since, therefore, we have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God. For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life."

Romans 5:8-10

 

“For God so loved the world,that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn  the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him."

John 3:16-17

 

My Jesus

By: Anne Wilson

What Kind of Man?

By: Legacy Five 

 May you know the JOY & PEACE of Salvation through Jesus.  HE has conquered death!

Word of the year - 2023

 For the past several years I have chosen a "word of the year".  A word to focus on throughout the year.  Typically I find a Scripture, or Scriptures, through the year to study and better understand the word I have chosen.  This year I wasn't sure if I was going to choose a word.  A couple weeks ago one of my kids asked me if I had chosen one for this year.  When I told her I hadn't decided yet she proceeded to list the last several words I have done and asked if I had any ideas for this year (a great reminder that even when you don't think your kids are paying attention; they most certainly are).  

 

 

I had been praying about if I should have a word for 2023 but hadn't settled on anything.  After that conversation I continued to pray and the next morning God gave me a word.  It "just so happened" (but as we know nothing is a coincidence) later that day a friend sent a group text sharing her word and asking if any of us did or were going to do a word for the year.  It was a neat confirmation that yes, I would have a word and yes, the one I had landed on that morning was the right one.  

Now, before I share what my word is this year I wanted to share another sweet interaction with another one of my kids.  Two recent conversations had highlighted the importance of both home and family.  In those conversations she had expressed how she loves coming home on Mondays because she knows that's my bread baking day and she looks forward to the house smelling like freshly baked bread.  In a separate conversation she shared how that as she gets older she's starting to understand what her dad and I have always said about siblings one day being very important; if not your best friends.  These ideas of home and family lead me to my word.....comfort. 

The verse God gave me for this word is Psalm 119:76 "Let your steadfast love comfort me according to your promise to your servant."  We find much comfort in home and family; in the familiarity, safety and belonging of those things.  As believers we fully have those things in Christ.  We have an eternal home, secured for us by Jesus' sacrifice and we have a family, linked by One Spirit.   All of that comfort is found in the love of God.  His love is sure, His promises are true and we can take comfort in them.  No matter how uncomfortable this world can get we can find comfort in the truth of God's love and His promises.

As mentioned in this previous post, I am once again reading through the Bible in a year.  I'm planning to look for God's promises as I read.  Below are just a few of these promises:

"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, 

that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.

for God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order 

that the world might be saved through him."

John 3:16-17 

 

"For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life

in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Romans 6:23

"fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God;

I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my

righteous right hand....For I, the Lord your God, hold your right hand; 

it is I who say to you, "Fear not, I am the one who helps you."

Isaiah 41:10 & 13

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to 

his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope

through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance 

that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you."

I Peter 1:3-4

What other promises can you think of?  

What promises of God are comforts that you return to over and over?  

Do you have a "word" for 2023?  If so, how did you see God working to bring that word to you?

To every thing...

 ...there is a season. 

The theme of seasons is one that has been on my mind a lot over the past few months and has seemed to come up in conversations a lot recently.  I have often said that it is a topic that I feel is, many times, lacking in how we teach our children.  Life is full of seasons.

Several times when chatting with our older kids I've mentioned how that just because they are in a certain place does not mean that is where God will have them forever. We are to grow where we are planted for as long as God has us in that place.

-There will be times of joy, savor them.

-There will be times of storms, find comfort in the fact that we have an anchor in Jesus and He will bring us through the storm. 

-There will be times of unknowns, focus on the fact of what IS known today and the fact that we are held by the One who does know.

-There will be times of sorrow, while "weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning." Psalm 30:5 and one day "He will wipe away every tear" Revelation 21:4

In August we celebrated my grandmother's 102 birthday; so many seasons in a life that long.  Her memory isn't the best these days but I treasure the many stories she shared with us about her growing up years and the changes she saw in the world.  Also, the skills that she taught me from baking bread to crocheting, some of which I am now passing on to my kids.

This month also marks the death of Queen Elizabeth II. I have been interested in English royalty and history for awhile now and have read much on the War of the Roses, King Richard III's life and reign and much regarding Queen Elizabeth II.  So much history and culture tied to her life; and now the closing of that season. 

There is a sense of bittersweet as we move through seasons; letting go of what was and learning to embrace what is to come.  On this, the first day of fall, I'm thankful for the seasons God has set in nature to remind us that while change can be uncomfortable there is beauty and growth in each and He has a perfect purpose for each season.

Praying for the prodigals (and parents)

 The other day a friend said to me "[your kid] is such a good kid, you've done a great job with [them]."  I said thank you but a part of me cringed a bit.  When we have kids we think that's what we want to hear; it's encouraging and I know that that is exactly what my friend was doing; encouraging me, and I so appreciate that, we need that. But yeah, I did cringe a bit and I want to share why that type of encouragement is harder for me to hear lately. (this friend is awesome and super encouraging so this is not to disparage her comment in any way; it was just a reminder of some things I've had rolling around in my head for awhile). 

So much of parenting is trying to do the right thing.  We are told there are no formulas, but yet we still think if we just do x, y, z, then our kids will come out great; they'll stay on the straight and narrow.  There are Scriptures that encourage us to train up our children in the "discipline and instruction of the Lord" (Ephesians 6:4) or the verse that so many quote, to "Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it." (Proverbs 22:6).  It's essential that we as parents are teaching and training our children in the ways of God; but is that a guarantee?  Is Proverbs 22:6 a principle or a promise?  We could debate those things but here's something that is crystal clear....our children are unique humans with their own free will; while there is much that we can control, ultimately there are decisions and choices they will make that we have no control over.  If we think anything different we head down the path of pride.

Let me say, that I have been guilty of this; of judging parents based on how their teens & young adult children choose to live...and yes, I've been humbled as my own kids move through the teen years.  Yes, we do as parents have influence on our kids and we should absolutely be striving to do our best to teach them, not only that they should follow Jesus but also why following Jesus is the best way.  But there is no formula.  We can pray, teach, discipline, surround our kids with others who love Jesus and they can still fall away.  And all too often when that happens we, even as believers, tut-tut our tongues and say "well, what did the parent's do wrong?".  We become prideful and think "if they only did this or that then their kid wouldn't have walked away".  Do you not think that the parents are asking themselves those same questions?  What could we have done? What did we miss?  It's so easy to say "wow, great job" when the kids meet our expectations of how they should act or think but when they don't "fall into line" we can immediately think "wow, what did you as a parent do wrong?"  As parents we constantly second guess if we're making the right decisions; we pray, seek to follow God's Word and do our best. 

The other aspect of this is that when we see the kids struggling with faith we often pull away; after all we don't want our kids being influenced by them.  What is wrong with that family? So what ends up happening is the family is further isolated and feels deeper shame, the struggling child is pushed away and no longer even tries to ask questions or engage in church, etc.  They feel the judgement too.  So, when you see a family, or anyone struggling or being a bit prickly why not lean in to build a closer relationship rather than stepping away?  Those parents need to hear that even when their children make wrong choices that the parents are still doing a great job when they pray, continue to teach and still reach out to others.  They need encouragement too!

As parents we need others to speak truth to our kids.  Especially for teens, they need to hear from people who aren't mom & dad.  They are trying to figure out who they are; and how their faith is theirs.  Some of us have raised our kids up in church, Christian homes, some in Christian school, some home schooled, some in public schools all raised with the Gospel.  These kids have made professions of faith and yet when they got older they walked away.  Some of us have kids right now that are struggling with their faith, figuring out what they believe, why the Bible is true.  As they get older and aren't really kids anymore it's natural to struggle with these questions; how are we as believers coming alongside them in this?  Are we?  Answers like, "it's just faith, you just have to believe" often aren't sufficient; are we teaching them apologetics; the logical reasons?  Why our faith is not a "blind" faith?  What evidences there are all around us that reveal God?  How we practically live out our faith? As our own kids move through the teen years it's been eye opening to see how their thinking changes; they need those deeper discussions and answers; and often they need to hear those answers from others...not just mom & dad. 

When my friend made that comment, what she didn't know is that the kid she was complimenting came to faith later in their childhood.  A lot of prayer and tears were said and shed for them and the hardest lesson I learned was that I had no control over whether they ever came to faith; what if I prayed the rest of my life and never saw that child accept Jesus?  We are told that "neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth." (1 Corinthians 3:6)  We are to be faithful to do our part but only God can change hearts.  I praise God that they did accept Jesus as Savior and one of the sweetest gifts ever was having that child allow me to read their testimony they had written out and seeing specific ways God answered my prayers and worked in their heart to bring them to Him.  God is "not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance." (2 Peter 3:9) but each of us has to make that personal decision; it's not one we as parents can ever make for our kids.  I remember hearing someone say "Adam and Eve had the perfect parent and they sinned and walked away"  We need to remember this and stop judging other parents so harshly, we need to pray for and with each other.  We need to pray that God will honor those prayers and that the "prodigal" children will listen to the Holy Spirit and turn back.

One final thought: If you are a parent of a "prodigal" child who accepted Jesus and has now walked away; know that Jesus has not let go.  Jesus says in John 10: 28-29 "I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand.  My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father's hand."  I'm praying for this generation and their parents.  That those who have walked away will turn back to God and He will do mighty things through them!  

One way to truly listen....Read!

In my previous blog post I mentioned the importance of listening to the voices of those different than we are.  Our search for wisdom and guidance should always first come from God; but just as Jesus listened to those around Him and had compassion for those oppressed we also need to truly hear the voices of the oppressed and hurting around us.  As an adult I've come to realize that social issues are so much more complex than what is portrayed in the media; social, mainstream or otherwise.  

When 9/11 happened the search for understanding Afghanistan lead me to such books as The Places In Between, The Sewing Circles of Herat and more recently to The Broken Circle and Three Years in Afghanistan.

When the conflict moved to Iraq I read books including The Prince of the Marshes and Waiting for an Ordinary Day.  The Iranian issues had me reading Honeymoon in Tehran, Persian Mirrors, and I, Who did Not Die.  Wanting to better understand this entire region lead me to Heirs to Forgotten Kingdoms. 

I've read books such as Between Shades of Gray and Symphony for the City of the Dead, to learn more about World War II.  Books like Beautiful Hero, Between the two Rivers, A long way Home and The Great Fire to understand more about the horrors and consequences of genocide. Books like In the Land of Invisible Women and Paramedic to the Prince to learn about life in Saudi Arabia.

I've also read several biographies of US Presidents and the book Barracoon: The story of the Last Black Cargo to try and better understand the complicated history of the US.   More recently I read Upstairs at the White House to get a better understanding of the pressures and duties of the First Ladies who serve alongside their husbands.  

These are just some of the books I've read that have helped me to better understand and have more compassion for those with different backgrounds.

And now I find myself once again looking for those voices....those of African Americans and other minorities.  I've watched fictional movies like The Green Mile and The Help and felt the sadness and anger that people could treat others...made in God's image so poorly.  As I thought through the books I've read I couldn't think of many that really explore the true stories of those minorities living alongside me....and again I was saddened by this realization.  

So, I would love to hear recommendations for authors or specific books; preferably non-fiction books.  As a friend recently said; It is never too late to learn to do better.  

Proverbs 19:20 "Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future."

Philippians 2:3-4 "Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others."

Proverbs 1:5 "Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance,"

 

There is still Hope

I’ve started writing a blog post a few times but words are coming hard these days. I’ve felt anger and sadness but also hope and thankfulness. Thankfulness in the fact that George Floyd was a believer in Christ and despite the events surrounding his death, is now at peace with his Savior. Thankfulness also for the police officers who have spoken out against hate; who have walked with those hurting and have said “we are mad too; what can we do”...starting a conversation. Hope, that conversations are happening; people are coming together and speaking out against such sin.

As I’ve thought over these events I’m reminded of these words from John 10:10 “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” The hatred we see is from the devil!

While Jesus was here on earth he exemplified the breaking down of prejudices; He showed that ignorance is not bliss. Ignorance leads to fear and so much of the hate we have comes from fear of things we do not understand; Jesus has not given us a spirit of fear (2 Timothy 1:7). When we place labels on people and don’t talk to them, the seeds of fear and hate have fertile ground to grow.

When Jesus was on earth...

He defied prejudices by speaking to the Samaritan woman ~ John 4:1-26

He defied prejudices by defending the woman accused of adultery ~ John 8:1-11

He defied prejudices by having Mary learn at his feet along with the men ~ Luke 10:38-42

He defied prejudices by touching those considered unclean ~ Mark 5:25-34

...and in so many other ways His life spoke out against prejudices and hatred.

Jesus did not dismiss or minimize their experiences; He met the hurting with understanding and love. He spoke Truth and Hope to their brokenness.

So what do we do? We pray for hearts that mourn over sin, that desire to follow hard after Jesus. We read...first and foremost the Bible; our source of Hope and Truth...looking to Jesus and the examples and instructions he set for us. Then we listen to those with different experiences and backgrounds; we meet them where they are and we listen.

God made us different because our differences teach us things we could not know if we were all the same, our differences give a beauty, richness and fullness to our lives here on earth. It is the devil’s way to try and destroy all that God has made for our good. We should be celebrating each other not trying to kill and destroy! We should instead be hating the sin that tries to destroy hope. There is a place for righteous anger Ephesians 4:26 says “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger,” but James 1:20 reminds us that “for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” Our anger needs to be rooted not in our own thoughts or towards others but in the things that God hates...sin!

Romans 12:15 says “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.” Let us sit with those weeping and as we weep with them and meet them in the hopelessness and chaos let’s remember to point them to Hope and Peace Himself...Jesus! “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” ~ John 16:33